February 9 (in the quiet heart is hidden)

The Ancestor had an echocardiogram done at the hospital today. It's an ultrasound of the heart. It made me feel so strange to watch the screen that became familiar to me through two pregnancies gone astray. I half-expected to again see some mysterious little person, a fabulous bean with eyes and organs and a rabbit-fast heart. Instead, what I saw was the alarming outline of a tiny, slender fellow, his arms out to the sides, doggedly beating drums. What a wild vision. So there's a man living in The Ancestor's heart! But which one is he? Who's keeping her blood marching?